Buena Suerte to the Giron family

There is a big hole in the staff of the Sea Dell and no one will be able to fill it. Lacey, our manager, and her husband Marvin, our all-around Mr. Fix-It, leave for Guatemala tomorrow. Marvin has been living in the U.S. for nine years as an illegal alien and he is going home to have his immigration hearing and get his green card. The lawyers say that it should happen in about six months, and we are hoping sooner. The positives: Marvin has not seen his family in nine years. If he went home before, he couldn't return. And, now he won't have to look over his shoulder and worry that he will be picked up and sent back without so much as a goodbye. The negatives: leaving family, home and jobs for an indefinite period of time and worrying about the outcome of the hearing.

Lacey and Marvin met on the beach one New Year's Eve. Neither was looking to meet someone, but that chance meeting changed their lives. Marvin didn't want to leave Lacey to return to Guatemala and making a living for both of them was much easier here. They eventually got married, and kept it a secret for a long time. They are a terrific couple! Hard working, conscientious, reliable, honest, caring and smart. It was easy to be happy about their union. Last year they added Brianna to their family and turned out to be wonderful parents also.

I am very proud of Harry for helping Lacey and Marvin obtain a lawyer and begin the legalization process. His encouragement and support and interactions with the lawyers were, in my opinion, what got them this close to having a real future, free of worry, with an open door to opportunity and success. Marvin contributes to our society, and enhances it, by being a kind, loving and responsible father, husband, friend and citizen. What possible reason can there be for keeping him out?

Customer Service - HA!

Is anyone else out there going as bonkers, nuts, crazy and is emotionally drained as I am over the amount of time spent on "customer service" or most accurately, lack of?? I know there are exceptions and some companies are right on target helpful, etc. but getting to that one person who can solve your problem is an exercise in whether you will give up or have a seizure first. First you are encouraged to try a support "portal" on the Internet and wait for a resolution for your issue. And, after no response for several days, you try again which means you are requesting support about your support request. Then, you get a response that you need to call customer service, whereupon calling, you are put on hold "due to blah, blah increased call volume." Then, after talking to someone in India who you cannot understand even though his English is more perfect than yours, and giving him every conceivable account number, email address and other information you can think of including your first grade school name, you are informed that you need to call technical service and he will transfer you. And then, you get the Muzak blaring in your ear while you wait for that elusive person who is going to solve your very minor but very annoying problem that like so many others, seems to take up so very much time in your life. And, so here I am, on hold AND able to write this whole blog during that time...

ADDENDUM 8/26 - After waiting on phone 54 minutes, I had to start over. Since Sammy sensed I was about to crawl through the phone, he wrested it from my semi-permanently curved fingers and politely handled the rest of the transaction. This time, the new Indian representative did his job, resolved the problem and I asked to speak to his supervisor and praised him for 5 star service.

An Attempt at Putting my Expensive Education to Use

An Attempt at Putting my Expensive Education to Use

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Kelleys Island

I am Grammy Care or Aunty Care to these four sensational kids. Gianna and Dom are my great niece and nephew and Jack and Ruby Kate are my grand kids. I spent last week with them on Kelleys Island in Lake Erie. I like my role. I like to have little kids soft pudgy hands to hold. I like when they climb on my lap and I can smell their summer warm sweaty hair smell. I like to have them telling me the important things in their world. I like how clear their eyes are. I like how they are uninhibited and can dance around with joy and abandon. I like to be goofy with them. Kids are just the best.

My grandson Jack and my son, Matt, picked me up at the Detroit airport. I thought they were outside in the car and I stepped off the escalator and marched forward to baggage so that I could get outside. Out of the corner of my eye I saw a little kid streak across the floor, screech to a stop in front of me and when I looked down it was Jack. I was so surprised and delighted that when I bent down with all my carry-ons dangling to give him a hug we toppled over onto the floor. Matt said we delighted the surrounding people who "aahed" over the scene.

We toured the Henry Ford museum in Detroit as our first stop and that evening met with my girlfriend Peg from Cleveland who was visiting family in Toledo for pizza with her brother and his family. The next day Megan, grand kids and I headed to Kelleys Island. Once across on the ferry, it was goodbye routine and hello vacation. No cable TV. No Internet. Limited cell service. A very nice house that we shared with my brother Tom, my sister Suzanne from DC, my two nieces Erin and Trish and Erin's kids. Later in the week Matt and Erin's husband Dave were able to get off work to join us. My sister Mary Beth and her husband Tom also visited for a day.

The week was relaxing and I found myself getting mellower as the days went by. Anyone who knows me, knows that I have a restless nature and am not a great "sitter". I found I enjoyed the simplest of activities! Playing Scattergories, making S'mores, picking wildflowers with the kids, taking walks, boating, laying in the hammock (always with three or four little bodies climbing in also), fishing, riding a golf cart around the island and, at night, watching the Perseid meteors in the most clear sky (and being able to see the Milky Way). But, most of all, just being with family and people you love and care about and catching up.

Highlights of the week: Ruby Kate had a stomach bug which got to three of the four kids. It didn't seem to cramp their style, but there were some "accidents" from both ends causing excitement (especially when on the boat out on Lake Erie). Dom, who is a year younger than the other two four year olds struggled to keep up with the big kids and he and Jack in particular had the testosterone going. No one could ever be "second", "slower", or have a toy that the other didn't want. Dom was talking in his sleep and his mom heard him say "Jack, don't take my truck." Wish my bad dreams were so simple! Jack walked in to the house and smelled Erin's delicious dinner cooking and said "That is the taste of my life." He and Dom would get into a spat, and Dom would start to cry and then Jack would crumble and cry. He can be bossy and tough one minute and sugar sweet and sensitive the next. When I said goodbye to him the day I left, he stopped what he was doing, looked up with tears welling in his eyes and said, "I am going to miss you." And if anyone thinks boys and girls are not different from day one, they are crazy! Dom and Jack could occupy themselves by throwing rocks, or on the boat with their pet fish - which were really dead minnows used for bait - by naming them, holding them, kissing them. Ugh. Gianna would not be interested in a dead fish. In fact, Gianna, as I have learned, is a real princess. Not the type you are thinking - she is the Disney type. Because her Grammy told her. She twirls and primps and dances and poses and is as girly as imaginable. And, considering how sweet and beautiful she is, maybe she really is a princess. I wouldn't be surprised if a movie comes out soon starring her. And lastly, but definitely not least, was little Ruby walking around like a drunken sailor looking, as Erin said "so darn cute." She has two upper "chicklet" teeth, as Megan calls them, which are wide apart and when she smiles, she wrinkles her nose up and gives you a smile that lights up the world. I nicknamed her "Alfie" for Alfred E. Newman but she is definitely one adorable little girl. She made Aunt Suzanne guffaw by sticking half her finger in her nose. She tried to put her toe in one day also. She is so happy and just always toddling around, observing the chaos.

Spending time with my beautiful nieces and daughter-in-law, my siblings, my son and nephew-in-law rounded up the week. Thanks to all for the great time, memories, laughs, listening and company. I love you all.

I'm All Ears

One of my biggest pet peeves is about the art of conversation. In my opinion, and I hope my actions, I believe conversation is about give and take. One person talks and one person listens and then there is the lovely dance of back and forth. With some people, it feels incredibly difficult, as though there is no commonality and the conversation is strained and superficial. And then, there are those blessed conversations that are easy, comfortable and fulfilling. You feel like you leave the conversation with some sense of valued self worth and a refreshingly good feeling about the other person from their end of the discourse.

But as I have gotten older, I feel more and more aware that there are people who just want to talk, but not listen. I keep wondering if it is age related, or if it was always as evident but I lost tolerance. My blog tonight is leaving me feeling like I am not experiencing a good conversation, because I want to know how others feel about this topic, and I do not hear any response. Wow, maybe blogging is totally selfish and self absorbed and I am like the people I don't like!!

Washington DC trip

We had a wonderful visit in Washington this past weekend with three of the five grandkids. So, in the past two weeks, I got to see them all!

We stayed with my sister Suzanne and brother-in-law Fritz. Some people are great hosts and some houses great destinations, and they have it all. In fact, I have stayed over the years with them so often that I feel quite at home in my cozy front bedroom. They own a Sear's house in "lower" Chevy Chase (the non-snobby, slightly overgrown and decadently luxurious part) in NW Washington. A Sear's house was one that was ordered from a catalogue and delivered with every piece and part to be assembled on site. The house has the charm of old and the conveniences of the remodeling they have done. Fritz's backyard waterfall is the cherry on the sundae. We really enjoyed spending time with them.

Harry's ex-wife, Susan organized grandkids' Daniel and Stephanie's visit from Brazil. Jezebel, Matt and their baby Jenavieve came from Albuquerque. Jezebel's sister Lexie came down from NYC and Susan's partner, Steve, rounded out the group. We even got to visit with cousin Judy Caplan, her husband Dean and her terrific kids, Anna and Aaron.

Our first full day was spent doing the tourist thing and we had a great time seeing the Lincoln Memorial, the Vietnam Memorial (still brings me to tears), the new WWII Memorial (did not impress me), the White House, National Monument and having lunch in the Old Ebbit Grille. We ran up to the top of the Washington Hotel also which looks into the White House windows but I didn't see Obama since he was talking to the Pope.

Next day was a visit to Mt. Vernon and Alexandria. I was especially happy to see the tree under which Doug Urich's (my son Matt's dad) ashes were scattered looking healthy and vibrant overlooking the bucolic scene of the Potomac River. In fact, a bald eagle decided to fly over while viewing the tree making me wonder a bit about reincarnation...

We finished the day in Alexandria at the Chart House restaurant having famous Chesapeke Crab Cakes. Alexandria is quintessential brick, Georgian, old and quaint. Reminded me of Miami U., my Alma mater (and half my family's).

Our final day was a rush downtown to Union Station for a last visit with the kids. And, what great kids they are! Daniel and Stephanie are sweet, lovely teenagers. Kudos to Monica, their mom, who is also beautiful and sweet inside and out. No grotesque piercings or tattoos (that I could see), or rebellious attitudes. They seemed happy to be with family and both can understand English very well, with Daniel speaking more easily and being a very protective big brother to his beautiful little sister. A great surprise was Daniel telling us he wants to come to the US for college in a year and a half and we couldn't be more excited. Jenavieve, the youngest grandchild, is six months, and perhaps the most easy baby I have been around in a while. What a trooper - she was dangling from her perch in her Baby Born and not a complaint. And the ready smiles! Wow. She reminds me so much of her Uncle Sam as a baby. Looks just like him from the mouth up. Smile and chin are her handsome Dad's. I got lots of cuddle time.

Susan and Steve were great organizers and company and how lucky are we to be able to spend time as a large, extended family! I heard the comment from both Harry and Susan - that losing Douglas let us gain two fantastic grandchildren. The barriers that were created out of his mental illness are down, and we can all just get to know each other and move forward in relationships. Just wish he could have been a part of the scene.

Three Strikes You're Out

I just returned yesterday from my visit "up north" to attend Ruby Kate's first birthday. It was a very busy, and emotional visit. The first half, with Matt, Megan, Jack and Ruby was just fun. I helped Megan with the party, and the next day we headed up to Marblehead on Lake Erie to Megan's family's place. There was the usual large group of family and neighbors to visit with and we also took the boat over to Kelley's Island for dinner. The second half of the trip to Cleveland was a whirlwind of trying to visit friends and I was able to get in a golf game with my sister. But there were a lot of emotional issues to deal with. Friends seem to be various stages of difficulties, whether physical or mental health wise. What is going on? The sun needs to get in the seventh house and Jupiter needs to align with Mars. Pronto! I stayed at my friend Peggy's house, and that was just plain enjoyable and she kept me bolstered up during the visit. Thank you Maggie.

Today was a back to work day and we walked in the motel at 8 to find the back office window open - and then it occured to us to look at the cash box. Sure enough, for the third time in maybe a month, we were wiped out. This time wasn't so bad as there had been a drop to the safe last night - only several hundred missing. But, this is adding up! Add to that the expense of installing four security cameras after the last such robbery. We backtracked the tapes to 3:24 am and there was the culprit - but unfortunately they must have known exactly what to do as they were dressed in a bulky coat, gloves, hat and "dew rag" to hide hair. And, they knew where the cameras were to avoid looking at it. Drat! Sam has put it on tape so we can study it a bit. Police were called, report given, locks changed (again) and this time, we fired an employee!

I think the fact that her (the employee's) boyfriend is on parole for theft (of her daughter's jewelry!) may have made us uncomfortable. Or the fact that she has been having visitors at work in the back office during her evening shift according to other staff that have happened to stop by. Or that her boyfriend's friends were the ones who trashed a room we gave them at a discount and he didn't compensate us and later we found out that they were just out of jail and having a crack and ho party. Or that last month she went over the phone allowance for her cell phone provided by us for late night check-ins by $187. That's it. Three strikes, you are out.

I liked Yvette. And, as my brother's friend Beaver says, "just because you're a loser doesn't make you a bad person." But she needs to do some serious looking at her world.

Oh, yeah, when I got the cell phone back from her before she left the premises, she forgot to delete a saved voicemail from her probation officer. DUH! I think background checks on new hires are the rule of thumb from now on.